When One Door Closes...

When you’re in the midst of dealing with a breakup, it often seems like you’ve lost your chance of being happy and having true love, when in fact the opposite is most likely true. Chances are that by ending this relationship you are actually moving one step closer to true, long-term happiness.

What do I mean by this? Well, when I interviewed people involved in happy, long-term marriages, I found that nearly every single one of them could recount a time when they were miserable and heartbroken over the ending of a previous relationship. But now that they were truly happy in their current marriages, they all expressed gratitude and relief that those previous relationship had ended, allowing them to eventually meet their true loves. If you’re currently dealing with the pain of a breakup and are worried that you’ve lost your chance at happiness, try doing your own survey of people you know who are in happy, long-term relationships. I’ll bet that most of them will be able to remember a time in the past when they felt just like you do now, and will tell you how grateful they now are that that old relationship had ended since otherwise they never would have found their partner!

So take heart in the knowledge that by moving through your current pain you are actually bringing yourself closer to finding a truly loving, fulfilling, and lasting partnership in the future. And I will leave you with one final thought: if we never had to go through breakups then most of us would still be with our boyfriend or girlfriend from junior high. (And if you're just now breaking up with your J.H.S. squeeze, you're just gonna have to trust me that better things are waiting ahead!)

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